Sometimes I wish I had a job at Target. No, really. You have set hours, set pay, set responsibilities. Stick these on that shelf – Sweep this aisle – Scan items – Take credit card – Bug customer to sign up for Target card another 10 times – give receipt – say goodbye. You don’t even need to talk to any fellow employees, if you don’t want to. No emotional involvement, if you don’t care to, and no screwing up your job other than if you decide to show up late. When you are done work, you are done. You don’t take home stocking shelves to contemplate over all night long. Helping customers locate that one random picture frame they can’t find doesn’t emotionally drain you. No hassle. You show up and you get paid kind of deal. Plus, discount? Who wouldn’t love a Target discount?
Today is just one of those “Target” days. A day in which I am done in all aspects of the word with people, expectations, emotions, responsibilities, miscommunication, lack of sleep, not knowing what will happen on any given hour, where work ‘schedule’ actually means work ‘life’ and attitudes that bring everyone down! Don’t stick mine into that category today because I’m venting on the blog – alright?
I get so discouraged at how people’s anger and hurt, even when the hurt is very real and very painful, keeps them from wanting to resolve conflict… And the hurt turns into more anger which turns into bitterness which then start working it’s way through our team. I hate how the sin of pride turns this bitterness into “being right” instead of “being love.” (And, no, I’m not perfect in doing this…)
And, let me tell you…when you’re on a team of people that live, work, eat, serve, fellowship, hang out, cry and laugh together every. single. day. of. every. single. month. of. every. single. year. (Except when 1 or 2 leaves on vacation…) Let me tell you – you feel everything. It’s Christian community at it’s finest and it’s worse. You feel the joy and sin in ways that let you realize that you truly ARE a body of Christ. If there’s sin, the whole body suffers. If there’s joy, the whole body is lifted up.
Today, I feel the suffering. Kind of been a situation for a few months now. I’m worried for those involved that it is turning to bitterness. Makes me frustrated. Makes me sad. Makes me discouraged. Because it will work it’s way through our team and that won’t be good. Our team has been in a really good spot for awhile now – really good body of Christ working together and helping one another, respecting others’ gifts and encouraging those!! I don’t want to see that go away just now… So in my frustration I just kind of decided that I’d really like to be working a shift a Target today instead of being here.
Would rather turn off all the emotion and just sweep some floors or stock some shelves or run a few credit cards. In God’s grace and mercy, He has made sure that Target will not be arriving near Marghita anytime within the near future – like ever. And, instead, He has made sure that there is no way I can run away today – or tomorrow – or in the near future, from my team and the amazing (although sometimes amazingly hard) community He has created among us. Sometimes I wonder if living this closely together with a group of people is more difficult, or working with the abandoned kids?? I think the ministry lines between the two are often blurred!
So, with that bit of honestly to tied you over until tomorrow… I’ll wish you all a Noapte Buna!